To The Nice Guy

It seems these days you meet a great guy and you two instantly click, you see things going in one direction but he sees them going in another and  you’re both afraid to speak your mind. After all,  his actions make you think this is more than just a hookup; he must feel the same was as you – so time goes on and all your questions go unanswered until you finally feel brave enough for whatever response he might have. You feel you’ve dragged this on for far too long and you want to badly for him to just say “ I like you a lot and  I really enjoy all the time we’ve spent together and I want us to make it official.” But – instead, he says “ I’m too busy for something serious” he tells you he never wanted it to be anything other than a casual thing or sometimes he just stops returning your calls and your texts and all you have left to do is blame yourself, pity yourself for being “so stupid and not seeing all the red flags”. Your questions still unanswered and now you have a deeper wound, another piece of your confidence is chipped away at and you can’t understand how he just picked up and carried on.

But sometimes, you meet a great guy and you two instantly click, you see things going in one direction but he sees them going in another and  you’re both afraid to speak your mind. After all,  his actions make you think this is more than just a hookup; he must feel the same was as you – so time goes on and all your questions go unanswered until you finally feel brave enough for whatever response he might have. You feel you’ve dragged this on for far too long and you want to badly for him to just say “ I like you a lot and  I really enjoy all the time we’ve spent together and I want us to make it official.” But – instead, he says “ I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I truthfully didn’t want to hurt you because I loved the time we spent together, I wasn’t ready to walk away yet and that’s my fault for being selfish. I do really like you and unfortunately if things in my life were different the outcome of me and you wouldn’t end so soon,  Just know this is as hard for me to send this as it is for you to read it and I really don’t mean to sound corny, I hope one day we can be friends again because we really get along so well and I enjoy having you in my life, have a great semester and you will find a guy who is ready and can give you the things I can’t right now.” And it’s guys like that, that keep me hopeful there are good guys out there.

The best guys though are the ones who put themselves out there;those guy are the ones you meet  and you two instantly click, you both see things going in the same direction but you’re both so afraid to speak your mind and scaring the other one off. After all,  his actions make you think this is more than just a hookup; he must feel the same was as you – so time goes on and all your questions go unanswered until you finally feel brave enough for whatever response he might have. You feel you’ve dragged this on for far too long and you want to badly for him to just say “ I like you a lot and I really enjoy all the time we’ve spent together and I want us to make it official.: and that’s exactly what he says- he tells you “ I do have feelings for you, and I should’ve told you that sooner but I was nervous that I would mess things up and that was the last thing I wanted because you mean a lot to me, we have the best times together – we don’t have to do anything and I still have the best time with you. We should just give it a try and see what happens because I’d rather try with you then never know what could’ve been”.

The key thing that guys fail to recognize is that even though rejection is tough, I would rather hear exactly how you feel so that I can walk away and get my closure. Sure it will hurt but time goes on and new guys will come along and I’ll be okay without you. Hopefully one of those guy will be the one who isn’t afraid to take that leap of faith and act on their feelings and that is truly someone worthy of you and what you have to offer. So this is a thank you to all the good guys out there – whether you just had to break things off with a really great girl or you decided it was time to take the next step with her. We appreciate the honesty, that’s all we ever wanted from you.

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